So you want to be an entrepeneur?



No you don’t.

I’ve spent the better portion of my life being an entrepreneur. By no means do my words to you qualify as anything but opinion. Age alone, provides the context of reality through the wars to be fought…………if in fact, you are truly committed to the entrepreneurial path.


It comes with a price. It comes with undeniable potential. It also
comes with the true reality that no one can ever really prepare you for that is my story and it is now my responsibility to give back. So many people in my life have helped, mentored, supported and allowed my entrepreneurial path to continue. I am merely paying it forward in speaking with you. I will try and answer any question you may pose. I can provide you with as much insight as I can. I can help illuminate the staggering paradox of this life.

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You will hear from me a somewhat harsh reality. The “what they don’t tell you” form of what you’re in for. It is truly an adventure waiting to happen. Not for the faint of heart. Not for the weak of mind.

My story begins with the recognition that I don’t take direction very well. I don’t like working for anyone else. Sounds simple; doesn’t it?

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Come and enjoy an evening of laughter and information.
My conversations will be chalk full of both. You don’t have to listen. You just have to show up.

— Keith Marchant

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Tickets are $25.

Space is limited.

Light snack and beverage
Contact Cheryl @ Norma Jean’s Closet: 250-516-7653 or

Sept 15th 5:30 -7:30 light snack and Beverage

2405 Beacon Ave.,Upstairs on Beacon


Listening skills are an important part of communication


Listening skills are an important part of effective communication


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Listening skills are an important part of effective communication

Last week’s feature focused on communication skills and their importance in the workplace. This week’s feature is about the other side of communication-listening skills.
Hearing is the physical ability, while listening is a skill. Listening skills allow one to make sense of and understand what another person is saying. In other words, listening skills allow people to understand what someone is talking about-the meaning behind the words.
The United States Department of Labor Secretary’s Commission on Achieving Necessary Skills (SCANS) identified five competencies and three foundation skills that are essential for those entering the workforce. Listening skills were among the foundation skills SCANS identified as being critical.

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Good listening skills make workers more productive. The ability to listen carefully allows workers to better understand assignments they are given. They are able to understand what is expected of them by their management.
The ability to listen and to comprehend also allows workers to build a strong rapport with coworkers, managers, and clients. Employers and managers have confidence in workers that can listen to instructions and then do what is expected with minimal follow-up. Good listeners also have a better track record resolving problems with customers.
Workers who listen well tend to work better in a team-based environment. Team members are usually assigned a portion of the work. Later, their completed tasks will need to fit in with other team members’ results. Those who were able to listen well and perform accordingly will find their work results fit better than those who misunderstood.
Not everyone intuitively knows how to listen well. The following tips will help those who feel like they need a few pointers:
-Maintain eye contact with the speaker. This will demonstrate to the speaker that the listener is paying attention.

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-Do not interrupt the speaker. Wait until he or she is completely finished, then ask questions. Listening long enough may answer several of the questions without the need to ask. When the time is right to ask, repeat instructions first and then ask appropriate questions.
-Control body language. As much as possible, sit still while listening. This implies that the listener is paying full attention to the speaker. A nod of the head can be good, as it implies agreement.

-A good listener knows that being attentive to what the speaker doesn’t say is as important as being attentive to what he does say. Look for nonverbal cues such as facial expressions and posture to get the full gist of what the speaker is saying.
Beware of the following things that may get in the way of listening:

Girl listening with her hand on an ear

Girl listening with her hand on an ear

-Bias or prejudice against the idea or the speaker. This includes language differences or accents.

-Do not let worry, fear, or anger get in the way. Some people are resistant to change, and that can interfere with listening.

-Those with a lack of attention span can have trouble listening. Make sure this is not related to the fact that it is someone else’s idea being listened to. Workers need to be mindful of their reactions.

The importance of effective listening skills for employees and managers cannot be overemphasized. Everything done in the workplace involves two-way communication-

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Never try to reason with an unreasonable person, you can’t win

 Don’t Try to Reason with Unreasonable People | Psychology Today
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Are there people in your life that you try so hard to get along with, but you somehow always leave the interaction feeling disheartened, sad, angry, or demeaned? Are there people you dread running into or spending time with because there’s just something about them that strips you of your power, either provoking you into acting “crazy” (when you normally are quite a sane, nice-to-be-around person) or somehow always managing to make you give up something that’s important to your well-being?


One of my coaching clients shared with me the experience of a person she is close to. He makes little digs all the time during conversation, despite claiming to be a supportive and loving friend. Whenever she leaves an encounter, my client feels a hollow ache of “sadness and hopelessness” that lasts into the next day. After spending time with this person she’ll often explode in the car on the way home, and her boyfriend looks at her like she’s nuts. She’s not—but the unhealthy nature of the conversation (as poisoned by her “friend”) is.

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The art of understanding and handling the unreasonable person is probably the biggest lesson I’ve learned in the last few years, provoked by some interpersonal and professional crises I experienced that I had originally thought were my fault. I was very fortunate to find an amazing relationship coach who has a background in psychology and unique expertise in personality disorders. She helped me to see that I was usually dealing with disordered individuals, and that I was making classic mistakes in trying to make the relationships work.

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As I’m a medical doctor with some training in psychiatry, understanding that I was dealing with individuals with a bona fide personality disorder was a huge “a-ha” moment. The thing is, there might be a clear list of characteristics describing someone with borderline, antisocial or narcissistic PD in the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders). But when you’re dealing with one of these people, it often won’t become (diagnosably) apparent until you spend a lot of time with them. And even then, if you’re really emotionally ensnarled you might not be able to spot it on your own.

Interacting with them might just make you feel really bad about yourself, or they may say and do things that don’t sit quite right with you. Often, they have such an otherwise charming way about them that they find a way to make you laugh afterwards, or do something nice that makes you confused about “which one” is the real person. Most people will choose to focus on the good stuff and downplay the pathological, often at their peril.

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A difficult person in your life might not have a full-blown personality disorder; they may just have related traits that express themselves from time to time. It still takes a toll on your self-esteem and well-being to be around them.

For the purposes of this article, here’s a short list of the types of people I would lump into the “unreasonable”:

  • Those you can’t have a reasonable conversation with; they somehow twist your words or totally confuse you and then tell you that you’re the one who doesn’t know how to communicate
  • People who make subtly or overtly demeaning comments or say cutting things to you disguised as a “joke”
  • Those that don’t respect boundaries and seem to enjoy stepping all over one after you’ve placed it
  • The types that aren’t willing to consider your point of view or listen to your side of things (or just stare at you blankly, or laugh, or explode, when you try to explain “how you feel”)
  • Bullies
  • Verbal or emotional abusers (these can also range from subtle to overt)
  • Manipulators
  • Liars
  • People who leave you feeling bad, sad, shaky or feeling sick in the pit of your stomach
  • “Crazymakers,” a.k.a. people who provoke you into acting crazy or unbalanced (and love making you feel like there’s something wrong with you when you do), when your behaviour across the rest of your life is proof that you’re not
  • The excessively charming who are too good to be true and have an ulterior motive
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10 Reasons why you need Instagram for your businessv

I honestly believe that any and every business can use Instagram to grow their business and their audience. I realize that Instagram may not be ideal for every business, however. Of course, the choice to grow a presence on Instagram will depend on your business, your goals, and your audience and customers.

If you haven’t decided if Instagram is the place for you yet, I’ve compiled a list of 10 reasons why I believe you should use Instagram for business. After reading this, I hope that you’ll have a broader perspective on the value of this platform. Then you can determine if it’s the right place for your business to grow.

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It’s not just the “trendy” thing to do

While there always seems to be some trendy new platform on the horizon that everyone is talking about, Instagram is not that. Having reached 150 million active users faster than any other social media platform (except Google+), it’s easy to see that this site is a force to be reckoned with. And with 65% of the world’s top 100 brands using Instagram, it’s not just where the “kids” are hanging out. With the growth that Instagram has experienced since it was launched in 2010, it is quickly establishing itself as one of the “big” social media sites.

Visual marketing

One of the big terms for 2014 is visual marketing. Most of the big social media sites have made changes to increase the presence of visual content as well as improving the ease of accessing this content. And as visual content becomes more and more important, Instagram will be a means to create high quality, original content. Instagram enables you to produce photos and videos which can be shared to other social media sites as well as being embedded into your website or blog.

Enhance your branding

One of the reasons that I love Instagram is the ability to edit images to convey emotions or connotations beyond the original image. The filters that Instagram provides can allow you to really enhance your images to coincide with your branding. For example, if your business has a vintage focus, you can use certain filters to add antique effects or vignettes to highlight the subject. Likewise, if you are a more modern focused business, you can choose filters which highlight bright colors and enhance modern lines.

Photos also disclose a whole new perspective of your business. Whether it’s behind-the-scenes images or before-and-after images, sharing these images can really enhance your branding. Develop a strong brand appeal on Instagram to show your audience who you really are.

Show your personality

Every business has a story and a personality. Whether you are a solopreneur or a business with multiple employees, there is a story and a personality. Use Instagram to really show this off. Do you have an office mascot? Do you celebrate milestones or birthdays? Do you decorate for holidays and seasons? Do you have competitions between departments? Whatever it is you do at work, chances are your audience wants to see it. Take advantage of photos and videos to really showcase your personality.

It’s not just for product based businesses

Many people assume that a photo based platform like Instagram is only for businesses that have products to sell. But this is really not the case! In fact, I am a service based business and I use Instagram all the time to grow my business. Obviously, product based companies have more “product” which can be photographed and shared on Instagram. But service based companies have a lot to offer too. It just takes a little more creativity.

Share images of projects you’re working on, client locations, cities you visit, your office, your staff, or any other aspect of your business. In all reality, everything you do everyday could be documented through photos. You just have to find creative ways to showcase it. You can also use short videos to answer questions or make announcements.

Take advantage of user generated content

Another big trend right now is incorporating user generated content (UGC) into your content. This means using images or videos that your customers have already created. Instagram easily enables you to access this content to repurpose or use in your own strategy! You can use hashtags, contests, tags, and other means to have your audience submit content to you. And best of all, you get great content to share with your audience that you didn’t have to create!

It’s marketer friendly

Unlike it’s giant parent company, Instagram doesn’t utilize Edgerank or any other algorithm to determine what your audience sees. Every post shows up and every post remains active in your gallery for future views. The newest feature, Instagram Direct, is a direct messaging function within Instagram. This tool could be used creatively to address customer service or support issues directly with your customers in a private conversation rather than publicly on your accounts. The introduction of ads (currently still in an early release phase) will also allow businesses to reach out and target even more users.

Instagram is also a very interactive site which allows you to connect directly with your audience. Asking questions and getting feedback is really easy to manage on Instagram and can really help you target your posts.

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Track your analytics

There are no in-app analytics with Instagram. However, you can easily track your data with Statigram. This site allows you to analyze your best posting times, when your audience is most active, your gained and lost followers, your most popular posts, and so much more! If you’re going to use Instagram as part of your social media strategy, knowing your data and analytics is extremely important.

Drive traffic and grow your business

Obviously, the ultimate goal of any social media presence is to grow your traffic and your business. Every week I am able to drive traffic to my blog directly through Instagram. While it’s not as easy to drive traffic directly to your site as it is on sites like Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Google+, etc. it can be done. On Instagram, you cannot share active hyperlinks in your comments and captions. The only place you can list an active link is in your bio. Make sure you use this wisely! Then in your comments, tell people to click on the link in your bio in order to direct them to the page you have linked there.

Whether it’s to your home page, your blog tab, a contest page, an opt-in form, or another page of your choice, putting the right link in your bio can drive traffic where you want it to go. You can also change this link as often as you like. This allows you to strategically utilize posts to drive your audience in whichever direction you choose.

It’s fun!

The final reason why I love Instagram for business is that it is just plain fun! If you have to “work” all day, you may as well enjoy it, right? Instagram allows you to engage with your audience and create fun, exciting content. Just make sure you don’t get lost in the fun for too long and get distracted from everything else you have to do!


So there you have it, my ten reasons why I think you should use Instagram for business. As I said above, it may not be for everyone, but I do believe that any business can use it successfully. Each month I will be sharing another Instagram related post to help you better understand how to use Instagram successfully. I hope you’ll stay tuned for the following posts!

Juhli Selby our instructor for our Instagram Workshop


Appearances and First Impressions. Making the first 30 seconds count

EdithIt’s somewhat ironic that people say, “Don’t judge a book by its cover,” because that’s exactly how everyone does judge a book.

I built my book business with a huge amount of attention toward cover design. Even when I had 70 employees, a super talented in-house art director, and was using many outside freelancers, I still spent more time thinking about book cover design than any other single aspect of the business. The book cover for my generally unknown authors was the first impression people would have, and the first impression was everything.

Similarly, when you make a business presentation, you have just one chance to make a first impression.
Business Presentations and First Impressions

In a book I published entitled The New Professional Image: From Business Casual to the Ultimate Power Look, author Susan Bixler elaborates in significant length about the importance of making your first impression a good one when giving a presentation.

Bixler notes: Books are judged by their covers, houses are appraised by their curb appeal, and people are initially evaluated on how they choose to dress and behave. In a perfect world this is not fair, moral, or just, she says. What’s inside should count a great deal more. And eventually it usually does, but not right away. In the meantime, a lot of opportunities can be lost.

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In each of our lives, Bixler says, there are hundreds of very important decisions that have already been made for us and that impact every aspect of our lives: our gender, skin color, height, the number of hair follicles on our head, the shape and size of our hands and feet, who our parents are, our siblings, our early childhood circumstances, and the country of our birth are all factors that we do not control or influence.

But what we can control is how we portray ourselves to the outside world. In transformational learning, the idea is to start at a place that is most visible and that allows for immediately recognized results. Wardrobe, grooming, and nonverbal communication are aspects of us that are apparent to the outside world. When combined, these factors can paint a picture of us as competent, knowledgeable, elegant, gracious, powerful, or anything else we choose to communicate.
Condense Your Presentation

Social psychologists studying the impact of imagery have determined that 30 seconds is how long it takes for someone meeting you for the first time to form a whole laundry list of determinations about your character and abilities. In 30 seconds, people form impressions of you based almost entirely on what they see – your clothes, hairstyle, smile, how you carry yourself, and the rest of your nonverbal communications. Appearances do count. These quick impressions can also be lasting ones. Psychologists call it the halo effect. The list of impressions includes your:

Educational level.
Career competence and success.
Level of sophistication.
Sense of humor.
Social heritage.

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Now, 30 seconds doesn’t give you enough time to pull out your college transcript, showcase your resume, or present character references. It doesn’t allow time to explain that you have talent, skills, training, and a substantial list of truly satisfied employers and customers. But when your initial visual message is a positive one, the person you’ve just met will tend to assume that other aspects about you are equally positive. Conversely, if your visual message is negative, that new customer, client, co-worker, or prospective employer may not spend the time and effort to discover the talented person inside.

Appearances count in today’s world, as much or even more than in earlier decades. Rigid “dress for success” rules have yielded to new, more flexible guidelines that encompass casual business looks as well as traditional power suits. But as the speed of the business world accelerates, the importance of making a positive first impression increases, too.

Appearances count, not only in first impressions, but also in ongoing interactions. In his comprehensive research on communication, sociolinguist Albert Mehrabian found that in a face-to-face encounter, 7 percent of a verbal message comes from the words used; 38 percent comes from the vocal tone, pacing, and inflection; and 55 percent of the message is transmitted by the speaker’s appearance and body language.
Personal Appearance Is Everything

When a college career planning and placement center surveyed 150 employers, they discovered that the number one reason for rejecting an applicant after the first interview was poor personal appearance.

In fact, those employers surveyed ranked poor appearance higher than being a “hostile, overbearing know-it-all” (reason number nine) or “late for the interview without good reason” (reason number 28). Obviously hostility or tardiness aren’t minor infractions, but the findings certainly support the importance of appearance.

OK, so how should you dress for your presentation? I would use the same advice I give people interviewing for jobs: dress slightly more formally than how you expect your audiences to be dressed for the presentation. If the audience’s dress is all over the spectrum, from extremely casual to formal, I would opt for the upper quadrant of formality and conservativism.
Takeaways You Can Use

First impressions have a lasting effect.
It’s human nature to judge people at first glance.
You have control over how the world sees you.
Dress more formally than your audience.

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Our next meeting for Sidney Meet Up Business Network

Date June 14 at Canoe Cove Joes

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Address: 2300 Canoe Cove Rd, North Saanich, BC V8L 3X9
Phone:(250) 656-5566
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Buffet with Poutine, Sliders and Salad
Price $25.00   RSVP
This is your chance to share your ideas and suggestions of different ways that we can improve the group
Please feel free to bring a guest and show them just what a great group of people we are.
#202 2405 Beacon Ave.
Sidney BC.V8L1X5
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Instagram is an online mobile photo-sharing, video-sharing, and social networking service that enables its users to take pictures and videos, and share them either publicly or privately on the app, as well as through a variety of other social networking platforms, such as Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and Flickr.Instagram is an online mobile photo-sharing, video-sharing, and social networking service that enables its users to take pictures and videos, and share them either publicly or privately on the app, as well as through a variety of other social networking platforms, such as Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and Flickr.

Workshop at Upstairs on Beacon

2405 Beacon Ave., Sidney by the Sea

May 19th 5:30 pm

Cost $25.00 light snack and beverage

Instructor JUHLi SELBy

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About JUHLi SELBy Social Media

My goal is to be a RESOURCE for professionals and small business owners who are new to social media! I know how overwhelming it can be when you’re new to this. I have actually had clients tell me they are afraid of social media. My job is to help get you comfortable quickly so you can get to the fun of building relationships that will help you get leads and sales for your business!  I help streamline the social media marketing information you need to learn, and show you ways to manage the time you spend so you can be as efficient as possible.

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